Skip to content
Browser Screensaver

Fake Windows XP Update Screen

The Windows XP installing-updates screen: deep blue, Tahoma type, and a segmented progress bar that fills in visible chunks.

Press F for fullscreen, Esc to exit.

Fake Screens & Prank Screens

View all 28
Show all 28 Show fewer

Browser Screensavers

View all

Monitor & Display Tests

View all

Fullscreen Timers & Clocks

View all

Screen Lighting for Video Calls

View all

Colour & Screen Tools

View all

Solid Colour Screens

View all

What the fake windows xp update screen is

XP updates ran on a dark blue field with a chunky segmented progress bar rather than a smooth one. The typeface is Tahoma, which is a large part of why anything from that era looks the way it does in memory.

This one lands differently from the modern versions. Nobody believes their laptop has spontaneously reverted to Windows XP, so it reads as a joke almost immediately — which for a lot of people is the better outcome.

Windows XP update prank screen online

Good on an office display or a second monitor where the anachronism is the joke rather than the deception.

Pair it with the Windows XP boot screen for a longer bit: boot, then update, then boot again.

How to run it, and how to stop it

Press F for fullscreen, then F11 to hide the browser’s own toolbars. That second step is the one that matters: an address bar sitting above the screen gives the whole thing away instantly.

To end it: Escape leaves fullscreen, F11 brings the toolbars back, and closing the tab removes it entirely. Nothing is installed, no file is written and no setting is changed, so there is nothing to undo afterwards.

Worth saying plainly — use this on people who will find it funny, and on machines you are allowed to touch. Show them the way out once the joke has landed.

Questions

Will anyone actually believe this?

Probably not for long, and that is fine. Nobody thinks a modern machine has turned into an XP box, so this one works as a visible joke rather than a deception.

Is the font right?

It asks for Tahoma, which is present on Windows and on many other systems. Where it is missing the browser falls back to the closest available face.

Is there a matching boot screen?

Yes — the Windows XP boot screen page has the black startup screen with the sliding three-block loader.

How long does the fake update screen run?

You choose. The run-time control sets how long a full sweep from nought to a hundred per cent takes — anything from one minute to two hours — and the progress is paced to land on a hundred exactly when that time is up. On reaching the end it starts over by default, so it keeps going until the tab is closed; switch it to stay at 100 per cent if you would rather it settled there.

Why does the percentage freeze part-way?

Because real ones do. The screen stops at an arbitrary number for a few seconds and then jumps, which is the single most convincing detail on it. The stalls never change the total run time — the bar catches up afterwards — and you can turn them off for a smooth climb.

Is the fake windows xp update screen safe?

Yes. It is a web page that draws a picture. It installs nothing, writes nothing to your device, requests no permissions, and cannot survive the tab being closed.

How do I exit?

Press Escape to leave fullscreen. If F11 was used to hide the browser toolbars, press F11 again to bring them back. Closing the tab ends it completely.